today marks the day, two years ago, that this life started. you're life gave mine a kick start i didn't know i needed. i knew how badly i wanted to be a mom, but never did i know how badly i needed to be a mom. i've told you this before and i'll keep telling you - you give me purpose, kid. real purpose. you gave me purpose the moment i kissed those cold cheeks two years ago at 7:21 pm. you gave me purpose during those mid night feedings, ball bouncing sessions, and mustard shit blow outs. this past year you transitioned into a little boy. exactly one year ago, you were still a baby. barely walking, bald as can be, and saying 'truck' here and there. today, not only do you walk like a champ, you freaking RUN everywhere. you have hair - more hair than some like to see on a two year old boy. sue me. and you talk - a LOT. you attempt every word spoken to you and you practically speak in sentences now. you even pretend to talk like your daddy and i do. you pretend to talk on the phone. you interrupt us if we talk without including you. you constantly seek affirmations from us - especially if you see a car that looks like someone's you know (it's actually scary how often you spot cars of the same make and model, even year - but in different colors) - "daddy caaa!" gets increasingly more aggressive until we acknowledge that yes, you indeed do see a car
just like daddy's.
you seem to love your life. you seem happy. of course you can't tell me yet how much, but i know you do. i know you love your family. us, your sister, your grandparents, your great grandparents, your aunts and uncles, your best friends.
today we spent the morning celebrating your first day of 2s at the seattle children's museum. you've never been before and boy were you ready for all it had to offer. you owned that place, exploring every corner, literally turning every rock. you ran like a mad man, your hair blowing in the wind behind you. i felt proud watching your curiosity take over. you're so smart. and you have this understated spirit that consumes me.
i think the love we feel for you overwhelms us at times. it's hard to describe how we feel about you and honestly, as you get older i get worse at it. i feel more overwhelmed at the thought of how big my heart is for you because every day it stretches and grows and takes me over. i look back on that instant love i felt for you the day we met, and i realize that it was really only a tiny itty bitty particle of what was to come. today, this love is so big, there really are no words to do it justice.
you are my heart. you represent everything that matters to me. you make me better. you own me.
happy birthday, sweet boy.